Weekly Meal Of Jokes And Observations To Steal

  • I'm not vain, I'm way to handsome to be vain. #
  • I'm so out of shape, I get tired from taking my breath. #

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Deadline to become a fuckin millionaire

I'll be rich in 9 months and 25 days.
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If there’s a will there’s a way

Anything is possible, except flying; traveling in time; turning lead to gold; moving things with your mind; seeing or talking to ghosts, leprechauns, the yeti, Xenu, God, Fred Flintstone, Andrea Merkel, Santa, Sgt Lollypop, the toilet monster; holding your breath for over twenty three minutes; throwing the first stone.

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