Weekly Meal Of Jokes And Observations To Steal

• I want to force myself to write daily jokes so I figured a twitter account would in some stupid way force me to do so – until I abandon it. #
• Also all jokes here are free to be stolen by whoever feels like performing them. #
• My skin is so white, when someone takes a photo of me, they're the one blinded by the flash. #
• My boss is such a douche, he refuses to talk to you unless he's also talking to someone else on his bluetooth headset at the same time. #
• My father is so tall that he needs to crouch to put his own hat on. #
• I haven't worked in Hollywood for so long, I can't even remember the taste of cock. #
• I haven't worked in Hollywood for so long, I can't even remember what cock tastes like. #

Powered by Twitter Tools